2 May 2012
Prom season is just around the corner – you know what that means! Students in high schools across the country will be sporting their finest (rented) clothing and painting the town red! Some of them may even be wearing outfits made out of duct tape! And they all know the proper way to travel – in an unnecessary long car with a partition so passengers can’t see the driver. That’s right, in stretch limos! America, haven’t you always wondered how that came about, when people started thinking “I’m going to a classy occasion, I better go in a car that can’t fit into many driveways?”
America in unison: “No!”
Great! Me too! The first limousinewas built all the way back in 1902, so the chauffer could sit under a covered compartment. The first “stretch limo”, e.g. the type that we all know and love today, first came about in 1928 so big bands could ride in style together. You know, like Benny Goodman? I remember listening to his music like it was just…almost 100 years ago. Fine, you caught me. I remember nothing about him. Happy?
Moving on… Inspired by such famed heroes as Benny Goodman [EDITOR’S NOTE: Max, we just caught you in this exact lie. Please don’t pretend you know anything about him again.], Americans began deciding to drive around in limos whenever they needed to go somewhere in style. Large-scale car manufacturers such as Lincoln and Cadillac used to make limos themselves, but there just wasn’t enough demand for them to justify altering their productions of scale, so now they’re made by individual limo companies. Although maybe if we shot up the demand, more stretch limos would be on the streets. You heard it, America. Demand our stretch limos! Let’s start right now! Call everyone you know!